We should have nipped this in the bud years ago. But, it has been a losing battle. The kids get support from the schools, friends, relatives; everyone except Mom and Dad. It's called Can I Have A Treat Now Syndrome! or CIHATNS. "I ate all my food, CIHATNS!" "I picked up my room, CIHATNS!" "I didn't wet my pants, CIHATNS!" "I only woke you up three times during the night, CIHATNS!" "I brushed my teeth, CIHATNS!" "I'm alive, CIHATNS!" Sometimes, it almost works to a parent's advantage. You know, "if you don't straighten up, you're Not Going To Get A Treat." But, mostly, it's pathetic to watch these kids. Like little puppy dogs waiting to be patted on the head. Like wild-eyed gymnasts waiting for the coach to say, "good job."

Primary kid's ambition: Setting up the portable swimming pool on the grass to listen to Dad complain about killing the lawn.

Primary kid's question: Have we done anything to irritate Mom and Dad today? We don't think so.

Kid's thought for the day: If we push enough of these buttons on the VCR, the movie has got to start...if not, it will be fun watching Dad try to figure out what we pushed. Quick, open the refrigerator...